Cleaning Up House

I am going suspend progress on this blog for roughly a week to two weeks.

The simple story is that I am behind on school work. I am behind because I have been lazy and more focused on drinking, playing video games, and sleeping. Also, I don’t really care. It’s hard to make myself care these days. Also, my classes are pass fail.

I also have not worked out and not progressed almost any of the goals I of which I wrote in a previous post. In short – I’m a mess. Some people would question me at this point – “How did this happen?” or more specifically, “What’s wrong with enjoying yourself? You’ve been cooped up in military school for a year and a half for christ-sakes.”

I say that it is good to enjoy myself – but part of what I enjoy is the ability to excel, no matter how hard or how stupid something is. I enjoy being able to turn things in on time or even early. I enjoy being able to keep my word. Okay. Enjoy is the wrong word. I take pride in the fact. If I am not organized I feel like a mess and the quality of my life suffers as a result. Sure. It’s a lot of stress, a lot of probably unnecessary stress to deal with. A lot of it I impose on myself. It’s how I keep myself accountable and how I keep myself moving forward.

I feel like for all the time I’ve spent in military school and knowing how to do things the right way I’d be able to have the self-discipline to do all the must dos and should dos when I need to so that they do not accumulate and clutter up my life. Plus I cannot enjoy the wannda-dos as much when I have a hundred should dos at the back of my head, turning into must dos the more time goes by. I know I am not perfect. But I also know, that I can be more than what I have been these past 5 weeks.


6 thoughts on “Cleaning Up House

  1. That’s hard. I have had that happen a few times this winter – worse than usual as a matter of fact.

    I just read Roosh’s post on the ideas of Campaigns. I know I personally have had a habit of taking on multiple Campaigns as he describes them at once. Then I overstress and overwork myself in a month or two month long flurry of productivity and fall to pieces when I inevitably drop the ball.

    One or two short term campaigns at a time are great. Get to a point where you can maintain the skill at a desired level with minimal practice. Multiple campaigns will cause you to fail to develop them to that point where you can make them a habit. Then the campaign becomes a failed goal and accomplishment, making you feel like shit.

    • Yeah I read that post and it resonated with me. I’ve heard somewhere that everyone seems to experience a productivity decline during January. Something to do with less sun and therefore less vitamin D. We’ll see what happens when I get my vitamin D supplements in March.

      • Less Vitamin D and most men’s Testosterone levels drop. Probably a combination of the less D and a biological proclivity to have less T in you. That way don’t go nuts and murder your family when you’re trapped in a cave most of the winter subsisting on whatever harvest you’ve collected.

  2. The skill you possess in this situation is the ability to recognize in yourself what needs to change. Also you have the knowledge of what you must do to get yourself back on track. Everyone gets off course from time to time, most just don’t know what to do about it, or have been taught to believe it is okay to stay there.

  3. How did you handle this?

    Beginning of 2014, I entered an all time low after a very strict diet of a few months. I was at my goal, in a way, but I was totally overstressed. Malnourished and overworked. During the diet I had forced myself to stand up early, work on many projects and even write on a book. I had totally overdone it and life had lost all joy.

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