I often wonder whether I should consider myself American, or European. I’m American by birth but European by upbringing and general attitudes. Generally, when I’m in the U.S, I feel European and when I am in Europe I feel American. The difference between me and most Americans? I have different political views, I have different views on sex, religion, alcohol, relationships. Damn near everything. The difference between me and most Europeans? I love guns and distrust government. There’s a smaller difference there.
My thought process moved to problem solving. That is, how do I solve problems? American? Or European?
But first I must decide in my mind how Americans and Europeans solve different problems.
To my mind, Americans solve problems in a simple manner. If ain’t broke, don’t fix it. It seems to be very trial and error, with simple fixes preferred. The old joke goes, in school, you learn a lesson and then take a test. In life you take a test and learn a lesson. To me, it seems as if the American way is to try something, learn something from the results, and try something else. Rinse, wash, repeat, ad infinitum until goal is achieved or resources are depleted.
The European method, is a little different. It appears as if they wish to learn everything they can about a subject or endeavor, develop a theory about it and then attempt to go about accomplishing the goal. When they do not accomplish what they wish, they go back to the drawing board and tweak the theory. Rinse, wash, repeat ad infinitum until desired result achieved.
I feel like the way I go about problems can be either way. In terms of game, when I first learned about it, I was a voracious reader and read everything I could on the subject. I poured through the entirety of [redacted] and Roissy and any other blog that piqued my interest. I was just in high school and internalizing some of the themes I read already started noticeably improving my life. But not only did I have my theories, or ideas in my head from what I read, I actively experimented. I experimented with my smell and with growing a pair. I did a series of “Red Pill Experiments“.
I recognize that there are some things you can not just theorize about. You have to go out and try things out for yourself. Cold approaching for one. I’ve never done much of it. When I do it’s not intentional, it’s an afterthought when I see a pretty girl who enters my space. I still have approach anxiety. I can theorize about it as much as I want, but I’ll never conquer it until I approach until it hurts. And then approach some more.
Until I got to Germany, I was encapsulated within military university. Not only were there not a lot of girls to approach, but they weren’t even worth the learning experience. Most of the girls are not that good looking and the ones who are, are potential career/cadetship enders. No thanks. I primarily kept my sanity through messaging Au Pairs on POF, in the DC area. Turns out my efforts were worth it. I’ll write more about that in the coming days.
But how did I go about it? I didn’t read up on a whole bunch of blog posts on how to do online game deliberately. I had some knowledge in my head stored from reading random posts. But I thought of the “openers” myself. I messaged hundreds of girls. I edited the message ever so slightly, adding a space here or comma there to avoid the copy-paste sensors. I found out what opener worked for me and what got the most amount of replies up to 70%. Did I figure that out by reading a blog post? Nope. I figured it out by repeatedly messaging girls with different stuff until I found out what stuck. I’ve read some online dating tips or read some tricks of the trade from other guys in the manosphere. I never made a really hot girl account or two to draw the guys away from other girls. I never made a second account just to test out openers. I got to where I did by good old trial and error.
Going back to the American or European bit, I’m not sure to if I can categorize myself either way. I can use both methods and they both have their uses, like direct or indirect game. I’ve never really been able to label myself nor have I ever really cared to, though I am always curious about what I think I am or what others think I am. Most of my life, I’ve never had a label and have therefore been able to hang out with any group as I pleased.
There’s a lesson in here somewhere, but I have to catch a plane.