Some Rules ‘We’ Made

My girlfriend and I have about six rules we try our best to follow (more successfully now than before).

  1. When arguing – no swearing or name calling
  2. No bringing up old arguments
  3. Unless we agree to do so
  4. Tell the other person before we go to bed if we’re angry.
  5. If we get far apart, we must come back close together (read: make up sex)
  6. No breaking up over a petty argument. If we break up, it’s serious.

She came up will rule #6 herself after she had a conversation with a co-worker who got into an argument with her boyfriend, broke up with him, cried about it, and got back together with him all in the same hour.

The only rules we’ve had trouble following?

#4 and #5

We tend to get silent when we’re mad and I don’t see her that much because she’s a three hour drive from my university.

She’s been my longest relationship so far and I suspect these rules may have something to do with it.


Memento Mori

Just the other day, I attended the funeral of my late grandfather. He had served through the second world war and ate thirteen bullets for his troubles. One of the bullets went through his head and several went through one his legs, crippling him and any athletic ambitions after the war. Despite that, he outlived all of the doctors who told him he would die after the way and clung stubbornly to life until the ripe old age of 89.

Leading up the funeral, I had done a lot of thinking. People say that once your parents die, you begin to come to grips with your own mortality. With the death of my last grandfather, I’ve started to come to grips with the mortality of my parents, of whom I’ve grown quite fond of in the last couple decades. With my increasing ability to understand the world around me and communicate the ideas from my head to people, I’ve developed a healthy rapport and mutual respect with my parents that I didn’t have even four years ago.

In his memory, I’ll dedicate this week’s posts to him.



Random Thought: Relationships Are Reverse Chess

Think about playing chess. When you play the game, you try to outsmart your opponent to checkmate his king. As you get better at playing the game, you learn to think several moves ahead. As you start to get to good at playing the game, you start to think ten or more moves ahead.

With relationships, every day you deal with the relationship, you’re playing a game of reverse chess. You play according to how the relationship is today, and how it was three hours, three days, three weeks, or three months ago. Women, with their masterful memories, lodging exact dates of arguments, what you said verbatim, and other otherwise innocuous actions play the game this way. This is why I think guys are surprised when relationships fail – they fail to think far enough in the past and fail to accurately identify fault lines in the relationship.

Players who find themselves surprised may accurate identify fault lines, but find themselves being outclassed in the ‘reverse chess match’ if they don’t deal with them right away.


Random Thoughts

I’m learning Russian at a neighboring university to mine. My teacher hails from Ukraine and often has much to say about Putin and what’s going on in that part of the world. One day, she informs the class that we will be listening to a speaker talk about his time in Ukraine. He’ll lecture to us about his experiences, ask us questions, in Russian of course, and a teacher will translate all of it for us, including our responses. Our speaker was former military and apparently took part in the riots.

He then went on to tell us the story about there’s four countries. But let’s focus on two of them; the US and Canada. Both countries speak English and all is dandy. But then Canada decides its national language is now French and the US, headed by hypothetical president McCain, decides to declare war on Canada. He explains a few more details like how Russia is using cluster bombs and that’s against the Geneva convention and then asks the group on our opinions about the whole thing. He also said that they’re plagued by the lack of good intelligence; the Russians had drones and Satellites and could bombard the Ukrainians with impunity. With a lack of imaging information, the Ukrainians would fire back and hit nothing or civilians, as the Russians allegedly fired from between buildings in villages. Our speaker recounted how young soldiers could go off and train for months and then get to the frontlines and die in a hail of accurate artillery fire.

To my memory, the students who were non-ROTC all agreed that Russia was being bad, but didn’t offer much beyond that. So the Ukrainian man asked the commissioning students what they thought. One guy nearly fluent in Russian, believed we should put tanks in Kiev, point them at Moscow, but not shoot. Another cadet expressed concern about what would happen if the US got involved and that it might escalate things. Judging by the reaction, his was not an especially popular answer.

I was curious about clarifying a few things. My first remark was, “Ukraine should stop trusting the EU and the US, since they’re operating under the idea that Ukraine will receive assistance.”

I then asked if either Ukraine or Russia had signed the Geneva Convention.

Are you crazy? Of course they signed the Geneva Convention.

That was the response I got. So I decided to remain quite and do a little research with the aid of my friend’s smartphone. With a cursory search, I discovered that it was the Soviet Union and not the Russian Federation who signed the Geneva Convention, and then, not even all of it. So if we were to say that Russia in its current iteration didn’t sign the convention, then the complaint about the cluster bombs is about as meaningful as complaining that the Taliban don’t fight by the rules like gentlemen.

I then contemplated a possible solution to Ukraine’s lack of proper ability to gain visual contact on Russians so as to fire upon them. I remember the speaker talked about how the Ukrainian armed forces had trouble even building trenches, for the Russians would fire upon them as they worked.

Then a light bulb appeared to me.

If the Russians can see the Ukrainians but the Ukrainians can’t see them, there is a solution. If the Russian armed forces are really in Ukraine, the Ukrainians should have some Russian prisoners by now. If so, they should use them to build their trenches. If the Russians can see the Ukrainians as well as claimed, they should not fire upon their own people and thereby allow construction of defensive fortifications. If the Russians can’t see so well, they’ll fire upon the prisoners and kill their own people. The resulting press outrage should be enough to cool even the Russian people’s perception of their country’s war against Ukraine.

Does that solve the war? No. But it’s more solution than I’ve heard anybody else come up with yet so far*.



*It should go without saying that I have yet to hear everyone’s opinion and therefore, it’s entirely possible there’s a good solution out there that I’ve missed.

The Only Vaccination I Can Truly Get Behind

I know I wrote on vaccines a while back. My opinion hasn’t changed much, but perhaps it’s a little more refined. My basic issue with vaccines is not the science behind it – rather the people behind it – the government and big pharma (that’s pharmaceutical corporations and companies that deal with any thing medically related).

Anyway – I read an interesting article on vaccination – by ingesting natural honey produced by Bees.

A letter to the New York Times editor about how local honey helps to fight allergies got me thinking, does it really work? I’ve heard about this natural allergy-fighting remedy before, but I’ve always wondered, how do you know it works? How much would you need to consume?

I only use local honey. The wildflower honey I get from a South Jersey honey producer is amazingly delicious. Tasted alongside of the grocery store honey that comes in a little bear, there’s no comparison. I always stock up at the end of the farmers market season so I have enough to last me through the winter.

No one in my family suffers terribly from seasonal allergies. My oldest son and I get itchy eyes and a bit of a sore throat when the seasons start to change in the spring and fall, but it only lasts a couple of days. We wait it out and don’t take any medication.

I wonder if our symptoms would be worse if I didn’t buy local honey? Could the honey mustard chicken recipe that my boys like so much that I may it weekly in the winter be medicinal?

The theory about the local honey and allergies is this: your local bees are more likely to collect pollen from the local flowers in your area. That pollen will end up in small amounts in the honey produced. By ingesting that honey on regular basis, the person eating the honey will build up immunity to the pollens from the flowers in their local region. It’s sort of like a vaccine taken little by little.

That’s the theory. There doesn’t seem to be any scientific evidence to back that up, however. I cant find any scientific studies that test the theory. Even without scientific evidence, this sees like one of those ideas worth trying.There are other proven benefits, too. Honey can immediately sooth a sore throat (whether it’s caused by seasonal allergies or not). It’s a natural, temporary energy booster. According the National Honey Board, it “contains small amounts of a wide array of vitamins and minerals, including niacin, riboflavin pantothenic acid, calcium, iron, magnesium, manganese, phosphorus, potassium, and zinc.”

In addition to the health benefits, buying local honey helps support local honey producers. Small bee farmers are on the front lines of helping to save our decreasing bee population right now, and purchasing their local products can help keep them in the fight.

My question to you is, do you use local honey to alleviate the symptoms of your seasonal allergies? Do you believe it works and why? I’m really curious.

Now that’s a vaccine I can get behind. I trust the bees more than I do the US government and merchants who live their life in their lifelong their ultimate desire: more. After all, bees are just following their nature.

We Watch Too Many Goddamn Movies

I was talking with my roommate the other day about how we both miss Berlin. We got to the subject of watching German TV, where I mentioned Tat Ort, a show the Germans love to watch on Sundays.

Apparently we both like the same German TV shows. He remarked that they were predictable.

Yeah, it’s because we watch too many goddamn movies“, I said. “Surprise! Another plot twist I did not see coming! Oh my…the foreboding character turned out to be the evil one!

And then it hit me. This is how older people see life. They’ve seen all the movies, tv shows, an have got the t-shirt[s] for it. They’ve seen nearly all the plot twists.

When my friend recounted how he told his grandfather that he wanted to study abroad in Germany again, his grandfather replied, “You can’t bullshit a bullshittter“. They both knew that my friend wanted to see a special lady again.

When i told my father, last year May, that I didn’t want to go to Munich to see the Zugspitz, he told me a while after about a phone conversation he had with my brother over the phone.

Summed up in one sentence?

It’s either girls or money.

He was 100 percent right.

As I get further along in my journey, through the accumulation of my own experineces and hearing the experiences of others, I’m starting to see more plot twists coming than I’d ever think I could. Nowadays I’m most right when I venture a guess. And the one plot twist I never saw coming is that sometimes I wish I wasn’t.


On the Current Social Dynamics of the Manosphere

I’ve seen much status whoring, attention whoring, highschool popularity contest whoring, bitching, moaning, and jockeying in the manosphere, in addition to quality content put out. Just as I’ve seen bloggers rise and fall from obscurity – I’ve seen cliques do the same.

I’ve also seen much discussion regarding said “jockeying, moaning, and etc” ranging from outright bitching to frustrated consternation. Some people express surprise at the formation of cliques – others express disappointment. Explanations regarding this behavior and the schisms caused by it are limited.

Therefore – I posit my own thoughts for review:

1. If one holds it to be true, that society actively discourages the formation of men only groups and seeks to break up said groups by adding injections of estrogen to the mix – then one could also hold that most men today are not used to being part of a male only organization. Therefore, one could also reasonably assert that they are not sure how to properly act in a situation – doing the same things they did socially when in mixed groups.

2. If you think about how there are women in the manosphere such as Sunshine Mary and Red Pill Wifey (oft referred to as the groupie-sphere) – then the manosphere is a good as a mixed group. Thus, the jockeying, formation of cliques, and a less single-minded purpose in the search for truth in all things.



On the Split between Game and MRA in the Manosphere

I’ve been talking about various topics from the Manosphere with my Dad for almost the entirety of the time I’ve been exposed to it. If an article or idea interests me, I send him an email with the link or even bring it up in conversation. Sometimes I even talk to my mom about things. While my parents don’t agree with everything I read or necessarily like all of it, they willingly engage in cross-examination conversation and genuinely discuss issues I am curious about.

For that I am infinitely thankful.

I recently reflected on a conversation I had with my Dad about the apparent split in the Manosphere between Game and MRA. I explained to my Dad what the two camps focus on and why I thought they split.

He took the time to explain to me his story of a previous divorce of his, before he married my mother. Out of respect for him, I dare not go into too much detail – so I will summarize. He got the best female lawyer he could. He took extra steps like recording conversations and doing his due diligence and got to the point where he made his ex-wife look bad in court. So bad, that, despite the judge’s reputation of automatically awarding custody of children to the mother, my dad’s ex-wife’s lawyer came to him with an out of court settlement. He got custody of one child, she got custody of the other. No alimony or child support.

What was his point? He doubted that things are much worse today like from the horror stories I’d recount from the MRA articles I read or the stories I heard about soldiers getting divorce raped by their wives. But even so, he said, he didn’t just let things happen, or watch in horror as the world acted as it is and not how it should. He acted and did what he could to rectify his situation.

It came to me. The biggest split I see between the MRA and the Game is that the MRA adopts the victim position while the Game adopts the aggressor position. It looks like the MRA is trying to follow the same tactics that Feminists use and the Game uses the tactics of Feminists against them. “You think I’m a barbarian Patriarch who beats women? I’ll show you a barbarian!”

For whatever reason it looks like MRAs do not advocate action. There is a lot of “All women are evil, stay away from them.” There is alot of clamour to use the political system to fix things. There is a lot of, there is no such thing as game, just talk to them.  In counterpoint, the Game advocates improving your health, fitness, state of mind, and gives you the tools to deal with vapid western women and tells you where to find women aren’t. The MRAs sound like the Turkey who runs around screaming, “The sky is falling! We’re all gonna die!” The Game gives men hope.

This is not to say that MRA side is useless. I believe they are still important in bringing about awareness so that one is not completely oblivious to the nature of women and how they can screw you over in today’s society. When they recounted hundreds of False Rape Accusations, the Game came up with methods on how to combat buyer’s remorse and use texting to create evidence that would help you in court. When the MRAs tell us about the ‘Male Rape’ whereby a woman cuckholds a man or claims she got pregnant by you, Game tells you how to find your ballsack and get DNA testing and to call that dumb bitch’s bluff and/or how to be conservative with personal information so that the girl cannot track you down and trap you. When the MRA recounts horror stories of women beating their husbands Game tells you to give them the equality they asked for. When MRA gets everyone in tears with a heart rendering story about an honest man destroyed by a vindictive eat, pray, love wife, Game tells you how to spot the women more likely to do that so you can pump and dump and how to spot the women who won’t, should you be crazy enough to still want to get married despite all you’ve learned about today’s state of affairs.

I am of the opinion that while both sides have their disagreements and pick at each other, they are two sides of the same coin. Yin and yang. In fact, I think a lot of men start in the MRA side and go onto the Game side. Some men don’t leave. Other men start in the Game side and never find need to visit the MRA.

I myself got into both sides and watched them parallel. I now no longer visit any MRA sites because I have a general idea of what’s out there and how to avoid it. I will never forget what I learned, but I am focusing on other things now. Every now and then a particular story grabs my attention, especially if the mainstream media accidentally concedes what we all knew all along. But at the end of the day, I have outgrown the MRA.

As for the future of the MRA, I cannot comment. I only hope that they continue to persist by opening the eyes of young and old men alike, to the pitfalls of the blue pill today, that those men may do something about it.

The common cliche goes, “The first step to solving a problem is knowing what it is.” In terms of solving today’s problem, the MRA section is step one. The Game section is step two.


Not Dead Yet…

I had a conversation with Bill Powell earlier and got my mind blown, as usual. As I get older and more experienced, and look back on my past mistakes, I see one pattern that is constant.

I held back. I didn’t take what I could get. I didn’t even try nearly as hard as I could have. Missed opportunities, missed chances. Looking back on things that are so obvious now. It hurts to count the missed chances, though luckily they are relatively few in number.

I know what the problem is. I didn’t know. I couldn’t conceive of all the opportunities out there. I couldn’t conceive of the chances. I didn’t look past my nose. I focused on the small details and missed the forest for the trees. I met some resistance and would stop. I didn’t drive forward for fear of making a mistake or, ironically, missing out on an opportunity.

What I am saying is, stop waiting around. There is so much to be had in this world if only you take them. It goes without saying that “Winner takes all”. When you get something, don’t stop there. Keep going. Keep going until it is impossible to go further.

Then realize that there is no such thing as impossible. There is no such thing as unattainable. There is iron, blood, sweat, effort, and perseverance  When you are young like me, you those things  in spades. Use them as much as you can. If it’s impossible, it’s not. It takes time, training, and perseverance to do. If something is unattainable, it is not. It takes time, vigilance, and perseverance to get it.

One thing my father taught me is the idea of breathing, from the military. If you’re still breathing, you can still think, and act to complete a mission. As long as you can breathe, you can work towards a goal. As long as you are breathing, time is on your side. If you keep at it, one day, you will have it all.