I recently read The Private Man’s post on Nuking the Hamster and really liked the idea. I read the comments and there were really nice one liner Hamster Nukes that I wanted to share with you all (Hat tip to Ian Ironwood).
And some more of my own:
1. Say “Hey! You look kind of cute”. Then get closer, purse your lips in disgust, “Woops. Nevermind.” [backturn]
2. When she flakes on you, send her a dick pick. Even better: send a picture of a shriveled dick (this is what you’re worth, baby).
3. Cougar bragging about how good she looks at her age (or the sexual peak myth)? “Oh you’re at just the right age…not dead. [backturn]
4. When some really ugly chick hits on you, shout, “Somebody call an ambulance!” “Are you okay? Something’s wrong with your face!”
5. When you go on a date who doesn’t look the same as she did online? Tell her what you really think. “You’re fat and ugly. And you lied to me about how you look. Good bye.” [backturn & exit the scene}
Have fun!
~Wald
I had a ‘rationalization hamster’ once, but I sent my cat after it. I found it on my porch gutted and beheaded. Been in peace ever since…
We need more cats like those. Clearly crazy cat ladies don’t get the right ones.
Wald